| 1. |  |
| "Waiter ! Have you got frogs legs ? " "No, sir, I always walk this way"... more
|
| 2. |  |
| "Waiter!" shouted the furious diner, "How dare you serve me this! Theres a damn TWIG in my soup!""My apologies," said th... more
|
| 3. | |
| "Waiter, waiter,theres a hand in my soup." "Thats not your soup, sir, thats your finger bowl."... more
|
| 4. | |
| A waiter brings the customer the steak he ordered with his thumb over the meat."Are you crazy?" yelled the customer, "wi... more
|
| 5. | |
| And how did you find your steak sir?Well, quite accidentally. I moved this tomato slice and there it was... more
|
| 6. | |
| CUSTOMER: Can you make a pig cooler? WAITER: Sure, spray him with a hose.... more
|
| 7. | |
| CUSTOMER: Can you make a pig shake? WAITER: Tell him the wolf is coming.... more
|
| 8. | |
| Customer: Do you have bacon and eggs on the menu:Waiter: No, we clean our menus regularly.... more
|
| 9. | |
| Customer: Give me a hot dog.Waiter: With pleasure.Customer: No, with mustard.... more
|
| 10. | |
| Customer: How come the Board of Health hasnt come in and closed you up?Waiter: Theyre afraid to eat here.... more
|
| 11. | |
| CUSTOMER: How do you make a pig float? WAITER: Just give him an inner tube.... more
|
| 12. | |
| Customer: How long must I wait for that turtle soup I ordered?Waiter: Well, you know how slow turtles are.... more
|
| 13. | |
| Customer: I didnt order this.Waiter: I know, but your meal tastes worse.... more
|
| 14. | |
| Customer: I thought the meals here were supposed to be like mother used to make.Waiter: They are. She couldnt cook eithe... more
|
| 15. | |
| Customer: That crust on the apple pie was too tough.Waiter: That wasnt the crust, that was the pie plate.... more
|
| 16. | |
| Customer: Theres something wrong with my hot dogs.Waiter: Sorry, Im a waiter, not a veterinarian.... more
|
| 17. | |
| Customer: This fish isnt as good as what I ordered here last month.Waiter: Thats funny. Its from the same fish.... more
|
| 18. | |
| Customer: Waiter, I cant eat this meal.Waiter: Why not? It looks all right to me.Customer: I dont have a fork.... more
|
| 19. | |
| Customer: Waiter, I found a hair in my turtle soup.Waiter: How about that! The turtle and the hare finally got together.... more
|
| 20. | |
| Customer: Waiter, look at this chicken! Its nothing but skin and bones.Waiter: Would you like the feathers, too?... more
|
| 21. | |
| Customer: Waiter, theres a button in my salad.Waiter: It must have come off while the salad was dressing.... more
|
| 22. | |
| Customer: Waiter, this food is repeating on me.Waiter: Good, we love repeat business.... more
|
| 23. | |
| Customer: Waiter, this soup tastes funny. Waiter: So laugh, sir.... more
|
| 24. | |
| Customer: What is this fly doing in my alphabet soup?Waiter: Probably learning to read.... more
|
| 25. | |
| Customer: Why does your sign say "Fine Dining"?Waiter: We can dream, cant we?... more
|
| 26. | |
| Customer: Why doesnt this restaurant have any specials?Waiter: Because nothing about this food is special.... more
|
| 27. | |
| Customer: Why doesnt your menu list prices?Waiter: We didnt want to make you sick before the food does.... more
|
| 28. | |
| Customer: Why dont you eat here, waiter?Waiter: Serving it is bad enough, I dont want to compound the felony.... more
|
| 29. | |
| Customer: Why dont you have doggie bags?Waiter: That would be cruelty to animals.... more
|
| 30. | |
| Customer: Why is this sandwich half eaten? Waiter: I didnt have time to finish it.... more
|
