| 1. |  |
| 10. You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the Earth.9. Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you.8.... more
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| 2. | |
| A brain walks into a bar and says, "I'll have a pint of beer please."The barman looks at him and says "Sorry, I can't se... more
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| 3. | |
| A circus owner walked into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little show. On the table was an upsid... more
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| 4. | |
| A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the bathroom. A few minutes later, a loud, blood-curdling scream is heard com... more
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| 5. |  |
| A drunk phoned police to report that thieves had been in his car. "They've stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the... more
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| 6. | |
| A drunk walked into a tavern, sat down at the bar. He placed a small cardboard box on the bar, and ordered a beer. When... more
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| 7. | |
| A drunken man gets on the bus late one night, staggers up the aisle, and sits next to an elderly woman.She looks the man... more
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| 8. | |
| A fellow decides to take off early from work and go drinking. He stays until the bar closes at 2am, at which time he is... more
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| 9. | |
| A fellow decides to take off early from work and go drinking. He stays until the bar closes at three in the morning, at... more
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| 10. | |
| A golf club walks into a local bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer.The barman refuses to serve him. "Why not," as... more
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| 11. | |
| A good samaritan was walking home late one night when he came upon this drunk on the sidewalk. Wanting to help, he asked... more
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| 12. | |
| A guy goes into a bar, orders twelve shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can. The bartender says, "Dang, why ar... more
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| 13. | |
| A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender if he will give him a free beer if he shows him something amazing. The bar... more
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| 14. | |
| A guy walks into a bar and sits down. He starts dialing numbers like there's a telephone in his hand, then puts his palm... more
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| 15. | |
| A guy walks into a bar and sits on a stool. in front of him he see's a big jar full of change and a little card that rea... more
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| 16. | |
| A guy walks into a bar holding three ducks. He sets them on the bar and orders a drink. After talking with the bartender... more
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| 17. | |
| A guy walks into a bar with his dog on a leash. The barman says, “Geez that's a weird dog: he's stumpy-legged, pink, and... more
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| 18. | |
| A jew, a priest, and a rabbi walk into a bar.The bartender says "Is this a joke?"... more
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| 19. | |
| A man drinks a shot of whiskey every night before bed. After years of this, the wife wants him to quit; she gets two sho... more
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| 20. | |
| A man goes into a bar and seats himself on a stool. The bartender looks at him and says, "What'll it be buddy?"The man s... more
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| 21. |  |
| A man goes to a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "You can't bring that d... more
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| 22. | |
| A man had been drinking at the bar for hours when he mentioned something about his girlfriend being out in the car. The... more
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| 23. | |
| A man had been out in the back woods for weeks, cutting logs. He was a bit scruffy and didn't smell very good. Finally h... more
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| 24. | |
| A man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself. Approaching the friend he comments, "You look terrible. Wh... more
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| 25. | |
| A man is in a bar and falling off his stool every couple of minutes. He is obviously drunk. So the bartender says to ano... more
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| 26. | |
| A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the rep... more
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| 27. | |
| A man walked in to a bar after a long day at work. As he began to drink his beer, he heard a voice say seductively "You'... more
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| 28. | |
| A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "If I show you a really good trick, will you give me a free drink?" The b... more
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| 29. | |
| A man walks into a bar and finds a jar full of money on the counter. He asks the bartender what it's for. The bartender... more
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| 30. | |
| A man walks into a bar and has a couple of beers. Once he is donem the bartender tells him he owes $9.00."But I paid, do... more
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